Fear...

We all have the fear of not being good enough
And that goes for all concepts
Not being good enough of a student
Or a son
Or maybe an artist
Or an engineer...

And yes, I've allowed those troubling thoughts
To storm my head
And they take control of every hour
Every minute of my every day
And week in week out
Month in month out
They linger about

Me?
I have the fear of being a "good for nothing" man
In the future that is...

Because for what I want to be
There is no "halfway good"
Or
"Good enough"
Because when money doesnt speak for you
Only your connection has a voice
And that connection is an evasive one
It runs from me at times...
And I'm left with nothing
But the nightmares
And the nerve-wrecking thoughts

I have the fear of failing
Failing my parents
Failing myself
Because I failed to comply with reality
And her with me...

Because I could work my way up
And become a company man
And sit behind a desk to earn a pay that'll send my kids to college
And be able to buy my wife the dress she had always wanted
Even take the family for a vacation

But I dont
Because I've failed that, too...

Because my mind
Is programed
Is built
Is crafted to follow sound
To follow sight
To ring true
And that is a poison
Which doesnt kill you...
No...
It tortures you
And when you beg to leave
It grants you no mercy....


I fear of being alone
Which at times,
I believe I am
Because the world has no brakes, you see...
It wont stop for you for your sightseeing
It wont call for you once time calls

I fear of being afraid
Of being me
And I'm afraid that fear will keep me
From being me...